For all of those who wished me a happy birthday via Facebook (and in other ways), thank you so much! I can’t respond to all of you individually, but the encouragement was very special to me at this point in my old age (elderly) years! I have a few thoughts (more than a few by the time I finish) about age and the passing of time. As in many of my sermons, I have three points to share. If you don’t want to read it all, just skip to point three, which explains my gratitude for your encouragement. I love and appreciate you all! Now read on…
Time Flies!
When I was young, I recall many old timers commenting about how fast time passes and how soon you get old. One day you are in elementary school and in what seems but a short time later, you are staring at a figure in the mirror and wondering where they came from. Is that really me, you say aloud to yourself?
The Bible describes repeatedly how fast time flies. Some of the best descriptions are in the Wisdom books, Job and Psalms in particular. I will just list them for you to look up later if you are interested. The first passage says that our days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle and that our lives are but a breath. Here is the list from those two books of the Bible. But as unsettling as time passing swiftly may be, God’s promises still reign supreme, as David reminds us in Psalm 37:25. “I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread.”
- Job 7:6-7
- Job 8:9
- Job 9:25-26
- Job 14:1-2
- Psalm 39:4-6
- Psalm 39:11
- Psalm 78:39
- Psalm 89:47-48
- Psalm 90:5-6
- Psalm 90:9-10
- Psalm 102:11
- Psalm 103:14-16
Time Ends
Time as we know it is a part of our earthly existence and not a part of God’s realm, for he is timeless. As Theresa often puts it in her prayers, he is already in tomorrow so we don’t have to worry about tomorrow. But for each of us humans, time will end. Psalm 90 is purportedly the oldest Psalm, written by Moses as a prayer. It is chock full of insights about time and the life that we live in time. I’ve probably used this Psalm more than any other passage in speaking at memorial services. Here’s the part that has always grabbed my attention and emotions, yet gives me direction.
Psalm 90:10, 12
10 Our days may come to seventy years, or eighty, if our strength endures; yet the best of them are but trouble and sorrow, for they quickly pass, and we fly away… 12 Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
Decade birthdays have always been hard for me, reminding me of how fast time has flown and that it will end for me. Turning 30 was a challenge, 40 a bigger one, 50 and 60 not so bad, but hitting 70 was seriously challenging. It intersected with Psalm 90’s terminology. I was depressed for some months as number 70 approached and arrived. I’m always fairly high up on the “weirdness” scale, but I pegged it during that time. I can hear certain people saying about now, “You ain’t wrong about that one,” or “So that was what all of that was about?”
The age issue was combined with other issues that exacerbated my pain. I was about to leave Phoenix after nine years and move to California. Transitions are never easy for me. I made what I assumed to be my last trip to Asia to teach in the APLA program (Asia-Pacific Leadership Academy). It ended up being the next-to-last. Theresa had been recently diagnosed with COPD and spent over a week in the hospital with pneumonia. But we survived to fight another day, that day having lasted another fourteen years thus far.
Oddly, turning 80 wasn’t that much of a challenge, even though the Psalm states that this is when we “fly away.” At that point, when speaking of my age, I began quoting a bit of that Psalm with the comment that I was now playing on House money! I have managed to keep that lighthearted view of being an octogenarian, at least much of the time. But at 84, the realization that it is coming to an end fairly soon does bring about those sobering contemplation times. I just want to outlive my angel of a wife so that she doesn’t have to mourn my death and adjust to living alone. If God grants that prayer, I won’t really care when my time ends.
Another Psalm that speaks to my soul is Psalm 139. It tells us things about God and ourselves that boggle the mind. Here’s what it says about our time’s beginning and ending.
Psalm 139:15-16
15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
Think of your life’s duration in this way. We are born with a stack of coupons, each representing one year. We can only see them from the top, which keeps us from guessing how many years we have to live. As the stack nears the bottom, we can tell that there aren’t many left, but we still cannot count them. That is where I am now. Maybe I am looking at only one coupon, perhaps several, but almost certainly not ten. My guess would be, factoring in my present health and my family’s life spans, about four more. But even with that, my time will fly by like a weaver’s shuttle and suddenly end. My 80th birthday celebration took place after almost dying earlier that same year, now 4 ½ years ago. Time ends – mine and also yours. Let’s just be sure that we fly away to the right place (by God’s grace)!
Time Reveals
Time reveals many things, doesn’t it? I won’t make a long list of what it reveals, but I must mention as an old man that it reveals what is most important in life. The closer your life is to ending, the clearer it becomes what matters most. Many things matter, for both time and eternity, but what does matter most? Before I hit the 80 mark, I thought a lot about what God had enabled me to do that was good – the teaching and preaching and writing and traveling, etc. In other words, the accomplishments. I am grateful for any of those which were led by God and not my own ego, and were helpful to others. But right now, those things don’t mean nearly as much as they once did even a short while ago.
Many wished me a happy 84th birthday and encouraged my soul. Many mentioned what I have done that helped them and that was encouraging. Thank you, truly! But what moves me most is when someone says simply, “I love you,” and really means it. That’s the real deal, isn’t it? I don’t long to be admired for accomplishments; I just want to be loved and accepted. I’ve started crying now as I write this, proof of the accuracy of what I am writing. Life is all about relationships, a statement I have made hundreds of times. A relationship with God, with our physical families, with God’s family (other Christians), and with those whom we hope will become a part of his family. But those relationships must be close and personal to really matter, the kind that touch our heart and help us to feel accepted and valued and loved and cherished.
As my life is winding down (fast), I am just so grateful to God for helping me correct my distorted view of him and to keep building my relationship with him. And I am grateful that he has brought so many people into my life to love deeply and to be loved deeply by them. They number in the hundreds and maybe thousands. I am overwhelmed with gratitude to him and to so many who genuinely love me, warts and all. I have loved life and seen good days – by the thousands. All of the activities and events have made for a life of high adventure, and I am most grateful for it all. So grateful. But what has time revealed to this now old man? What matters most is that I have loved and been loved – deeply and by so many. It has all been far beyond anything I could have asked for or imagined. Thank you and thank God!
