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God is Our Father

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! (1 John 3:1)

God is our Father and those of us in Christ are his specially adopted children – no truth in the Bible is more exciting! The cost of this adoption is the blood of Christ, which should humble us and fill us with a depth of gratitude that becomes our greatest motivation to serve. In fact, the fatherly love of God is what we are to imitate as we serve others in his name. Paul said it this way in Ephesians 5:1-2: “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” As we imitate him and live a life of love, we surely must develop his heart for his children.

How does the love of God show up in his treatment of us? Keep in mind that this is the kind of love that we are to imitate as disciples and show to the world.

Sacrificial Love

From his first contact with man until the present, God has shown himself to be a giver, not a taker. His concern is never what we can do for him, but only what he can do for us. He is absolutely selfless in his relationship to mankind. He gives and gives and gives some more. He is a Servant of servants, which explains how he can keep blessing us when we are unlovely, undeserving and unappreciative.

God does not take our sins against him personally, get his feelings hurt and pull his heart back. He keeps on giving in the hope that his kindness will once again lead us to repentance (Romans 2:4). When Jesus said that the first prerequisite for following him was sacrificial self-denial (Luke 9:23), he was only calling us to do what God has always done. Sacrifice is what God’s heart is all about – it is not something that he does, but something that he is. As you serve others, we must imitate that.

Respectful Love

God shows us respect by treating us as individuals and by expecting us to be the individuals we have been designed to be. He does not expect us to be like everyone else, but to be the best that we can be. The command to “train a child in the way he should go” (Proverbs 22:6) implies the need to understand who each person is and then help them to blossom into the plan of God for their life. Similarly, God does not try to force us into any mold that we were not made for, but patiently develops us into the mold for which we were originally designed – to be like Christ.

In essence, God shows us respect in order to help us become respectable. His approach is never to make us earn his favor by our performance, but rather, he treats us with love in order to help us grow and mature. As we work with others, we must give them what they need as an impetus to move them in the direction God has planned for them.

Resourceful Love

God uses any and every means available to help us grow into becoming like him. He has a multiplicity of circumstances and people he can call into play for our guidance, and he works everything out for our good. And our ultimate good is “to be conformed to the likeness of his Son” (Romans 8:28–29).

The greatest miracles, in my mind, are not the obvious ones in the Bible, but rather the everyday variety that are produced by God’s orchestration of so many behind-the-scenes details. To make the application to us as people helpers, we need to be getting as much (behind-the-scenes) input and help from others as possible. As Proverbs 15:22 puts it, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” We must continually be learners if we are to be effective teachers. Don’t be lazy and don’t be prideful; get help to be your best, and get the help from all available sources.

Positive Love

God’s love is positive in its expression to us. Positive reinforcement is one obvious demonstration of his kindness and gentleness. He knows exactly how to call us higher by encouraging us. It is easy to think that we help others improve by focusing on their weak points, believing that if they can just eliminate them, then they will really be great. The problem is that the other person’s self-esteem can take a beating in the process. God is full of encouragement as he generously expresses his love and commitment to us. With this approach, we can face critiques with confidence.

Protective Love

God is protective of us, choosing to expose our weaknesses in embarrassing ways only when we are stubborn and prideful. He works gently as he leads us to see ourselves and to resolve to change. Many of us can remember times in our childhood when we were embarrassed by teachers or parents in front of our peers. Such deep hurts are not easily forgotten. Thankfully, God is not that kind of parent. He deals with us gently and sensitively (Isaiah 42:3).

Determined Love

God never gives up trying to mold our characters and hearts into his own image. Gentle he may be, but sentimental he is not! The definition of discipling as “gentle pressure, relentlessly applied” finds its highest application in God’s approach with us. He never gives up and he never gives in. His attention to discipling is constant, for he always wants the best for his children. He perseveres with us far beyond what we can imagine. Just think of the story of the runaway son in Luke 15. No matter how long the rebellious son had been gone, the father in the story (representing God) never ceased to gaze at the horizon for any sign of his son’s return. When he caught a glimpse of him at a great distance, he literally ran to his son, eagerly accepted his repentance, and then quickly arranged a celebration party of grand proportions. God is determined to save us and determined to help us become the best we can be. How quickly and easily we can be tempted to give up on others. How unlike God we are when we do.

As we look at these amazing qualities of God as our Father, let’s determine to imitate them as fully as possible. He wants to express his love to others through us. Pray that others will feel his love through your love for them. Love like God loves, and both you and those around you will be filled with inexpressible joy. The love of God is the love of a perfect Parent. Embrace it for yourself, and then share it with others.

Where is God in My Mess?

Handling Injustices and Ill Treatment Spiritually

Life is nearly always somewhat messy, right? Sometimes it is so messy that we generalize and just say it’s a mess. I’ve been at that point many times, one recently that I will mention before closing the article. But for whatever reason, I’ve been getting a number of phone calls from people who are either in the middle of a mess or have friends who are. In all cases, other church members are involved in the mess, most often leaders in one role or another.

Surprising?

That’s not surprising, for at least two reasons. One, leaders are humans and thus imperfect and sinners. Two, we interface more with them in situations that are likely to be challenging because their roles put them with us in those situations. Do I have issues with some leaders? Since I authored one of my longer books on the topic of leadership and co-authored another, you can no doubt answer my question pretty easily. Do I have issues with all leaders? No, because I refuse to generalize about leaders, churches and members of those churches. But the point is well taken that we humans who claim Christ will have challenges with other humans who share the claim of being his followers. Most often those challenges will involve leaders. No surprises there, for reasons noted.

With those observations as a backdrop, the biggest issue by far is how we respond to those challenges. The application of common sense is a good place to start. Humans are still humans even in God’s family. Further, Satan is alive and well on planet earth to the point that John the beloved apostle wrote that “the whole world is under the control of the evil one” (1 John 5:19). Next, only a small minority of humankind is traveling the narrow road that leads to heaven (Matthew 7:13-15). Finally, in our quest for common sense on the matter, we need to realize that without a plethora of problems in the first century church, we wouldn’t have a New Testament (or if we did, it would be pretty short). With all of that in mind, let’s proceed with expectations that are at least within shouting distance of reality.

One of the mistakes I have made through the years is not always opening the Bible and looking at God’s words in print when giving spiritual counsel. I know the Bible well enough to work its principles into normal conversation and also to quote relevant passages from memory. In much of my spiritual counseling, I have used that knowledge in the way described. Although I believe I have been effective in most cases, I would have been more effective if the Book of books was open and we were reading it together. However, to avoid making this article overly long, I will do some paraphrasing along with some direct quoting. But I urge you to read the article with Bible open and read each verse as we discuss the passage.

God’s Directions Are Clear

When I say that his directions are clear, that doesn’t mean that they are easy to follow. Far from it. But if we truly want solutions, we can’t improve on what the Creator said about how his creatures should function. Many biblical passages could be listed here which would be quite applicable, but I will only mention the main three that I have been using lately. The first two apply to dealing with problems between individuals and the third applies to responding to broader church problems. In all three cases, I am going to offer my insights about the passages. Otherwise, if we but read them quickly, we might only catch the surface meanings and not the deeper, most important principles.

The Way of the Cross – 1 Peter 2:11-3:9

This is a long passage, but it is all about what might well be called the way of the cross. It begins under a heading in my Bible entitled, “Living Godly Lives in a Pagan Society.” Chapter 2:11-12 urges us to avoid sin because we are in a spiritual war and our lives should stand in stark contrast to any charges that others might make against us. Good introduction. Verses 13-17 admonish us to live a life of submission, beginning with submission to governmental rulers, and once again emphasizes the need to live in a way that that quietens the critics. In other words, be the real deal – walk the walk and not just talk the talk. He ends this section by saying that we should live as free people in showing respect to everyone and loving God’s family. But that lifestyle is described as living as God’s slaves.

Verse 18 introduces the final section of the chapter in addressing literal slaves and their behavior in response to their owners, regardless of whether they are kind or harsh masters. The way of the cross is about to go uphill fast with rocks strewn abundantly in the path. The word “slavery” catches in our throats in any combination of a discussion about Christianity. I understand. Slavery has been aptly labeled as the original sin of the United States. Yet in both the Old Testament and New Testament, slavery was regulated but not forbidden. Not only were there slaves in the first church, but slave owners. Because of this, many moderns have rejected the Bible and Christianity. Was slavery in the first century as bad as that in American history? I hope not, but I’m not sure we can be sure. Slavery would have to be viewed negatively in any setting in any century. Yet, Peter talks about it and uses Christ and the way of the cross as the solution in their setting.

1 Peter 2:18-23 (NIV2011)
Slaves, in reverent fear of God submit yourselves to your masters, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh. 19 For it is commendable if someone bears up under the pain of unjust suffering because they are conscious of God. 20 But how is it to your credit if you receive a beating for doing wrong and endure it? But if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. 21 To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. 22 “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.” 23 When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.

From the Sermon on the Mount forward, those who follow Christ are directed to respond to all kinds of ill treatment and injustices differently than those in the world respond. The concept of “turning the other cheek” (Matthew 5:39) is repeated many times in many ways throughout the NT. Christians must live as examples of this principle if we are to follow Christ. It goes against everything in us to do it, and few have done it well, even among those who call themselves Christians. Seeking revenge is natural; refusing to seek revenge is unnatural.

Back to our passage. Slaves submit to even harsh masters because their first priority is pleasing their heavenly Master, and he is pleased when we imitate Christ. He says, “To this you were called” (verse 21), referring to imitating Christ’s example of enduring unjust, harsh treatment. Not only did he refuse to sin generally, but he refused to respond with retaliation to insults or threats when suffering. How did he manage such unnatural responses? He entrusted himself to God.

After all, did not God promise to work all things (good and bad) together for the good of those who love him (Romans 8:28)? Did he do it for Jesus? Does he now do it for us? Jesus died a gruesome death as a common criminal as people spat upon him and cursed his very name. Did that work out for good? Jesus thought so. We who follow him think so. If God managed that outcome in the midst of the most extreme circumstances, can he not manage it in your circumstances, as challenging as they may seem? Is God not still God? We all say yes intellectually, but saying it emotionally is quite often a different matter. At least that’s true for me.

Broadening the Principle – to Wives

In 1 Peter 3, God applies the same principle, the way of the cross, to three other situations. First, Peter addresses wives with knotheads for husbands, i.e., those who “do not believe the word,” whether as non-Christians or Christians who aren’t obeying what they profess to believe. Either way, they are knotheads. So what does the Christian wife do in such situations to follow the way of the cross? Note that this is still the principle being discussed, for he begins the passage with “in the same way.”

1 Peter 3:1-4 (NIV2011)
Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Thus, wives are to be submissive to their husbands, with behavior that includes purity, reverence, a gentle and quiet spirit. They don’t react unspiritually to unspiritual treatment, but rather they go the way of the cross in following the example of Jesus. In verse 6, they are told that such responses can only occur when they don’t give in to their fears. What might those fears be? Probably that if they don’t fight back, they will become worse then doormats for their husbands to wipe their feet on. Did Jesus become a doormat for not fighting fire with fire? That certainly wasn’t his expectation.  “And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself” (John 12:32). Does the way of the cross work? Will it work for you and me? Only if we do it consistently, not simply try it occasionally. As I said earlier, the way of the cross is a steep one full of obstacles (mostly ourselves).

Broadening the Principle – to Husbands

Next, Peter addresses husbands, but for only one verse. That is puzzling to me. Most of the problems in my marriage are my fault as the husband. Most of the problems in marriages I have counseled (hundreds) have been similar, with more of the fault on the husband’s side than on the wife’s side. Of course, there have been some notable exceptions, but not a great many. But no matter my puzzlement, Peter begins with “in the same way” again as he continues to elaborate on the way of the cross and what it looks like when applied to marriage for the husband.

1 Peter 3:7 (NIV2011) — Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

Thus, husbands are to be considerate, which carries the idea of considering or studying the wife in order to know her well enough to meet her needs (figure out her love languages and provide for them). Treating them with respect is what all people need, and given the patriarchy views held in the first century toward women and wives, that was unnatural. Unless we understand how wives in that era were viewed and treated by their husbands, we will likely underestimate the counter-cultural nature of what Peter wrote here.  The way of the cross is unnatural, although with lots of practice and prayer it becomes more natural (thankfully).

Broadening the Principle – to the Church

I started to entitle this section, “Proceed With Caution – Hazardous Road Ahead!” You will see why in a moment.

1 Peter 3:8-9 (NIV2011)
Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.

We know that Peter is making this application to the church, suggested by “Finally, all of you” and “to this you were called” (pointing back to verse 21 of chapter 2). How does the principle of the way of the cross fit the church and all of our relationships within the church? Just like the example of Christ, it applies in two ways: live righteously and refuse to respond unrighteously to unjust treatment. Peter begins with the ideal, the righteous part, which includes being unified, sympathetic, loving, compassion and humble. Amen – that is what the church ought to be like! Why isn’t my church like that (some are thinking)? Undoubtedly that is the goal and one worth striving for mightily.

But he is still addressing church relationships when he wrote verse 9. If we are not to repay evil with evil or insult with insult, that clearly implies that we are going to encounter such in the church. And right there lies the ultimate challenge. We expect to be treated badly by those in the world. We expect to find a safe haven in the family of God. When that expectation is dashed by a harsh dose of reality, it hurts and hurts badly. I recall the Proverb which explains why this is so true. “A brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city; disputes are like the barred gates of a citadel” (Proverbs 18:19). When deeply wounded by brothers and sisters in Christ, how must we respond? “Repay evil with blessing.” Why? “To this you were called” – to the way of the cross, to imitate the example of Jesus suffering the greatest indignities possible.

Best Communication Principle in Scripture

The Bible is chock-full of teaching about communication with those outside the family of God as well as in it and within our own physical family relationships. All of these passages are jewels and golden nuggets. In my opinion, based on observation and personal experience, one rises to the top of the heap when dealing with challenging people in challenging situations. Here it is.

2 Timothy 2:23-26 (NIV2011)
Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. 24 And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. 25 Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.

We teach our kids not to use the word “stupid.” Overall, that’s a good idea, but Paul didn’t get the memo or at least the translators of this version thought that this word was the best translation of the Greek term, apaideutos. It is the only time the word is used in the NT. I like the word as it is translated here. Any married couple can tell you that the bulk of their arguments are actually pretty stupid and petty, focused on irritants and not real issues. If we don’t stop such arguments, they lead to longer lasting problems which are here termed quarrels, becoming something like an ongoing feud. But how do we avoid such disturbances in relationships and keep them from getting out of hand, and hopefully, end up with both parties in harmony?

First, just don’t allow that sinful part of your nature to take control of your emotions. Second, be kind to everyone, which in this context is applied to those who oppose you. Third, continue calmly trying to reason with those who do oppose you. Being “able to teach” means here controlling your emotions while continuing to reason. Refusing to talk is not the option given. Many people just shut down when they are mad or hurt. Most in this category justify their actions by explaining that silence is preferable to saying something that they will regret later. That sounds reasonable, of course, but it is not what the text says to do. Keep teaching, calmly. Difficult to do, yes, but as an emotionally based person, I assure you it can be learned and practiced.

Fourth, don’t take what is said to you personally. Otherwise, you will become resentful, angry and bitter (the normal progression of unchecked emotions in conflict). How can we do these things when what is said is hurting us, perhaps very deeply? How can we continue to gently instruct those who keep dishing out the pain? It’s actually a matter of recognizing the deeper issues of what is taking place. Your opponent in an emotional quarrel has been captured by Satan, who is now using the person to hurt and hopefully destroy you. The issues are really never about you and another human; they are about you, God and Satan; and them, God and Satan. It’s a spiritual battle taking place. God is always begging us to go the way of the cross and Satan is always begging us to do the opposite in taking the human way.

Since the captive is under Satan’s control, they are out of their senses. That’s why we must remain in ours, calmly and gently continuing to reason with them while we are praying that God will bring them to repentance. We cannot force anyone to repent, even ourselves. God is the one who grants repentance to all of us. Yes, we must at some point reach a desire to repent, or be willing to be made willing to repent, but God through his Holy Spirit must bring it about. If you believe this and pray as though you believe it, God will do it if it can be done in a given situation. Even if all of the right principles of dealing with difficult people don’t work on a given occasion, there’s always another day. God doesn’t give up on us; we must not give up on each other.  

This passage, in combination with 1 Peter 2 & 3, provides us with powerful principles of allowing God to work his miracles in the middle of our messes. I have seen him do it time and time again in my life and in the lives of countless others. It is not as if these principles have been tried and found ineffective; they are just not often tried and employed consistently. The way of the cross in Peter’s writing is applied as the way of the godly communicator in Paul’s. Both employ the same two foundational elements: be righteous in your own life and refuse to be pulled into Satan’s world by those who are behaving righteously. Peter says to return blessings for evil treatment and Paul shows how to do it in the communication process. A beautiful combination of the same principle illustrated in two ways.

Handling a Bad Church Situation

Peter ends up his emphasis on the way of the cross as it applies to disciples with what we have already covered in 1 Peter 3:8-9. But the question of how to respond to a broader situation involving a church that is, or seems to be, going in a bad direction is another issue. The two are related, but different in some ways. One of the recent calls that I received came from friends who were members of a church that was doing well, but who had friends in another church that was doing badly from their perspective. Some members of that church had already left and others were contemplating leaving. My friends admitted that their discouraged and angry friends in the other church were responding poorly but had a lot of truth in what they were saying. I tried to help them help their friends using two approaches.

One was going through the same two passages we have just gone through. We may be a part of a fellowship, but we as individuals have declared Jesus to be the Lord of our lives. If he is our Lord, we cannot fail to listen to what he says and follow it to the best of our ability. What he says in our two passages is that receiving bad and unrighteous treatment is no justification for unrighteous responses to those inside or outside the church. Period. No excuses and no exceptions. The way of the cross is the narrow way of Matthew 7 and thus the way of salvation. Both righteous living and righteous responses are salvation matters. Satan will try to convince us otherwise, but don’t listen to all of his justifications and rationalizations. They lead to hell.

The passage I find very helpful in these situations provides us with an example of a church gone bad.

Revelation 3:1-5 (NIV2011)
“To the angel of the church in Sardis write: These are the words of him who holds the seven spirits of God and the seven stars. I know your deeds; you have a reputation of being alive, but you are dead. 2 Wake up! Strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have found your deeds unfinished in the sight of my God. 3 Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; hold it fast, and repent. But if you do not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know at what time I will come to you. 4 Yet you have a few people in Sardis who have not soiled their clothes. They will walk with me, dressed in white, for they are worthy. 5 The one who is victorious will, like them, be dressed in white. I will never blot out the name of that person from the book of life, but will acknowledge that name before my Father and his angels.

The church in Sardis was dead. The members thought otherwise. Other sister churches probably thought otherwise too. God told the truth and told it bluntly. He called the church to repent and if they didn’t wake up, he guaranteed disastrous consequences. His word is full of commands, not suggestions. He is not fooled, and he is not fooling around. I find myself wondering how many of our churches today are evaluated by him in exactly the same way. The Christianity of America is a watered-down, polluted version of what Christ established and still expects. Scary stuff, that.

The helpful verses in the plight we are describing about a church gone bad are verses 4-5. In spite of the deadness of the church as a whole, there were a few who were still walking the walk. What were they told to do? Leave the church? No, they were told to keep walking the walk, for their consequences were promises of walking with Jesus in white, that their names would never be blotted out of the book of the saved, and they would be acknowledged by Christ himself before all heaven.

Would I ever consider leaving one congregation to be a part of a better one? Perhaps, but I would not leave in the midst of a storm on bad terms with those whom I left behind. In that case, I would be taking my sins with me that violated the passages we have studied. Therefore, I would also be taking God’s judgment of those sins along with me. I’ve never seen an angry, bitter person change their hearts by a change of location without repentance. Satan will fill your ears and hearts with justifications and human reasoning to make you think otherwise, but nothing less than true spirituality is going to work in old or new locations. You may move, but your problem is that you are going to take yourself with you, and without repentance you are still going to be you. After the honeymoon of a new location wears off, your sins will catch up with you. They always do. The church at Sardis and all individuals who are caught up in sin are always given one solution and one solution only: repentance. Whether anyone else repents or not, you must.

So Where is God in My Mess?

The title of the article suggests that I am going to talk about my own personal mess at some point. What I am about to write delves into another aspect of handling injustice and ill treatment. The other segments of the article dealt with how to respond to hurtful issues at the hands of other people. What has not been addressed is for me a bigger issue than these others, by a wide margin. What do you do when this perceived bad treatment is coming, in one way or another, at the hands of God himself? My belief is that all that happens to me or you is either caused or allowed by him. He is somehow involved in all that I experience.

I have another article on this website which affirms that I have lost my faith in coincidences. I think God is somewhere in the mix of all that I experience, always has been and always will be. That’s a wonderful thought when my life is going according to my plan but can be extremely painful when it is going according to God’s plan which differs from mine. You know what I’m talking about. Don’t get super-spiritual here and pretend that you don’t. You have been upset at God too. The Psalmists certainly were at times and expressed it in print for future generations to read. I’m grateful for their gut-level honesty.

Up until now in the article, I have talked generally about the messes that we all find ourselves in as disciples and what God tells us to do to get out of them. Actually, he has to get us out of them, but we have to cooperate with him by listening to his directions and doing our best to put them into practice. In all three cases, we don’t have control with what is happening to us but we can have control over our responses. These responses can then have an effect, sometimes a very big effect, on those who are causing us grief. What may seem impossible can become possible by the power of God. We just have to cooperate with him by taking what he said seriously enough to follow through by obeying him. He is in the middle of our messes with us and has solutions. We just have to trust them and put them into action.

But what happens when you have done everything you know to do and prayed about all that you can think of and you are ready to just give up? All of your spiritual approaches to spiritual problems for spiritual solutions no longer work. What then? Where indeed is God in my mess? Ever been there? If you are human, I imagine that you have. I know I have and will again. As my dear departed brother Wyndham Shaw often said, “I’ve been up and I’ve been down and I will be both again.”

A Hell of a Year – and Beyond!

God is right in the middle of it with you, regardless of what the mess is and how bad it is. He is always working to get us out of it spiritually, if not physically. So here’s my most recent story about my current mess, an ongoing story at least in one aspect. 2020 was a very hard year for me, one of the worst in memory. As the old saying goes among older people, “Getting old ain’t for sissies.” I think I did pretty well emotionally, spiritually and physically until about age 70. Moses did not write Psalm 90 without reason. Here’s the verse most applicable to this present discussion. “Our days may come to seventy years, or eighty, if our strength endures; yet the best of them are but trouble and sorrow, for they quickly pass, and we fly away” (verse 10). This was Moses’ only Psalm, and interestingly it was written during a period when life spans were typically longer. It was a type of predictive prophecy evidently.

I won’t list all of my life challenges of 2020, but the pandemic on top of it made for a really hard year. I was excited about the calendar hitting 2021 because life had to get easier, right? I’ve thought that many times at the end of a year and have most often been wrong. I most certainly was wrong this time. For just one example of my challenges, health issues were involved. I had one surgery at age four (tonsillectomy) and one in my early 60s. Since hitting 70, I’ve had five, the last of which was just over a week ago. Ten days earlier, I had a similar surgery and was called back into the doctor’s office for a consultation. I was told that the pathology report about the tissue removed for testing might be cancer and might not be. The test was inclusive in the opinion of three separate pathologists. So, ten days later I had a more invasive surgery to obtain a deeper tissue sample. I’m still awaiting the results to be relayed to me by my surgeon as of this writing.

But this issue was just one on top of a number of others that had raised my anxiety level to bad places. Yes, I did write a book about the topic of spiritual surrender. I have been fighting to surrender and stay surrendered pretty much all of my Christian life. It is not an easy war. I win individual battles from time to time when I am out of whack spiritually, and I have written a lot about my relationship to God and all that I have done to try maintaining a growth track. But keeping it real, this last year and a half has been the hardest period of a similar length in my entire life (and that’s saying a lot, by the way).

God – Brace Yourself!

A few days ago, my frustrations and anxieties caught up with me and I poured them out in print to God as a prayer. As I wrote, I came to realize that underneath it all I was angry with him. My conviction that all that happens in life is either caused or allowed by him left me feeling that he had pushed the edge and I was about to go over it. ALL OF THIS WASN’T RIGHT AND IT WASN’T FAIR! Where was God in my mess anyway? In reading the Psalms, I am sure that God can handle our emotions, even when we are at our worst and dumping all of our pain and sins on him. We have to do that with our own kids, don’t we? Why wouldn’t we think he is willing to do the same with us? He had Paul write that passage in 2 Timothy 2, which must mean that he practices it with us.

I told him in this wacko prayer that I knew my view of him, him and me, and life in general was messed up and it was my fault. In fact, everything was my fault – always! I further explained that I felt as if the old humanistic saying were correct: “If it is to be, it is up to me.” Thus, I needed to change my perspective on everything I was thinking and feeling. But I simply could not do it. And he would not, or so it seemed to me. I said all of that ridiculous stuff, and a good deal more. I told him I would just settle for being like a teenager saying, “Whatever!” when I couldn’t get my way. I would just keep going but with clenched teeth and rolling eyes. Thus ended my prayer. I could not change myself and God refused to do it for me. I felt like the writer of Psalm 88 as he ended the Psalm by saying, “Darkness is my closest friend.”

Gordon, you actually said all of that stuff to God? Yes, because if we think it he already knows it and we might as well say it. I had hit rock bottom – hard. Like Job, I was wishing October 27, 1942 had never occurred. That was the day I was born. Nothing happened in the next few hours to change my thinking. I didn’t get a phone call or a card of encouragement. Nothing happened out of the ordinary. Doom and gloom prevailed. My normally encouraging wife understood me well enough to just stay out of my way and let me fight my own battle with God. I described that morning to myself and later to others as having wrestled with God until he pinned me to the ground by my neck and forced me to cry, “Uncle!” through clenched teeth. He won, decisively. I was beaten and as disheartened as I could remember. It was, using the phrase from a very old movie, a “bad day at Black Rock!”

Out of the Clear Blue, a Miracle

Then a few hours later, a miracle occurred. All of a sudden, without warning, I was clothed and back in my right mind. Not one thing changed except my heart, and that without any human explanation – none. Amazing! I was simply staggered for a moment, and then began laughing and joking with God about the battle as I marveled at what he had obviously done. I have reached the point of absolute surrender many times through the years. I know when I am there, because in the words of Philippians 4:7, I find a peace from him that transcends all understanding. In that unexpected moment, I had it once again.

Most of my full surrender times in the past came when I was genuinely trying to surrender, using all of the spiritual approaches that seemed to aid in the process (and I have many). Not this time. I was doing nothing, for I had completely given up. I had hit rock bottom and was looking down, not up. Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, it all changed. God was making his point loud and clear. He wanted me to know beyond doubt that it wasn’t up to me. It was beyond me. But nothing was beyond him, even dealing with a totally defeated and hopeless idiot.

The frustrations on my list, including not hearing back from the doctor about my test results for what seems an inordinate amount of time (well over a week after the surgery I still haven’t heard), no longer mattered. God is in control. He can do what he wants to do when he wants to do it in any way he wants to do it. That’s all in his realm, not mine. I belong to him. He promised to take care of me and that’s all I need to know. I’m sitting on the back of this bus called life and he is the driver. My world is back on its axis and whatever comes down the pike of life will be just fine, up to and including death.

We would do well to read Psalm 139 regularly and meditate on its grandeur. I especially find comfort in this verse: “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be” (verse 16). Let’s just relax and enjoy the ride. It’s pretty much a roller coaster ride, but those are my favorite rides at amusement parks anyway. I’m not at all surprised that God fashioned my life to fit such a ride spiritually and emotionally. It’s been quite a ride, Father, and although we are nearing the end of it, I still love the thrill of it, especially in those days when you do the unexpected and inexplicable – a “God thing.” You are indeed in the big fat middle of my mess, the mess that is me, still loved and cared for by you. End of story (or this current chapter at least). Thank you, Lord, for still being in there with me. When I get it all on straight with you, fully surrendered, other issues in life are just not that significant. Pretty cool, or as my grandsons would say, pretty dope!

Children of the King or Servants of the King?

Which of those descriptions is true of us as disciples? Both, actually. We are the sons and daughters of God Almighty, Creator of the universe and King of this world and all worlds. But we are also servants of the King, the Master of all creation and of all peoples, those who submit (now) and those who don’t (yet). Ultimately, all will submit.

Philippians 2:9-11

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father”

The event in view in this passage occurs at the end of time when time shall cease, leaving only eternity in its place. Those of us who have confessed Jesus as Lord of our lives in this time-bound world will confess then with joy beyond measure, while those who made no such confession with tongue (and life) will then confess with horrific fear and unbelievable regrets. Then eternity with God will begin for the “few” who chose the narrow road of which Jesus spoke in Matthew 7:20-21. Eternal damnation and separation from God will begin for the “many” who chose to remain on the world’s broad road described in the same passage. Thus is reality described by God in his word – unbelievable joy and indescribable pain, depending on our choices regarding Jesus Christ, the crucified.

Back to the Title

Are we disciples children of the King, with the full rights that go along with that exalted depiction? Indeed we are! Sometimes we miss one of the most important points of the popular biblical parable we know by the term, “The Prodigal Son.” Our focus is, understandably, on the son who recently vacated the pig pen and has now come home begging for mercy from the Father he betrayed and sinned against. Remarkably, no begging was needed or even accepted. The Father in this story (capitalized because it is God who is represented) interrupted the prodigal’s well-rehearsed confession, showing that a repentant heart was enough to satisfy him. Beautiful! And, by the way, the Father was so anxious to have the son return that he ran to meet him. Will God run? Obviously, yes – if for nothing else, to welcome home a wayward child. Much more could be said about this part of the story. It is one of the most heart-warming stories in the entire Bible, one that gives us sinners hope. O Jesus, thank you for that!

The lesson I want us to see now is the one that comes in looking closely at the interaction between the Father and the other son. This son wasn’t guilty of the kinds of rebellious, overt sins of his younger brother, but guilty of sins that were far more serious and deadly. Those were the sins of self-righteousness and obliviousness to who he really was before God and who God himself was. He represented the leadership class of Jews, who like the Pharisee of Luke 18:9-14, patted themselves on the back that they did lots of right things and avoided wrong things. They looked good on the outside to their fellow humans, but putrid on the inside to their Creator. Scary stuff, that.

Sinners Are We All

As all self-righteous people do, he looked down his nose at those awful sinners, even his own brother. Especially his own brother. While the Father rejoiced at the return of his long-lost son and prepared a celebration festival, the older son was insanely jealous of his brother and incredibly resentful toward his Father.

  Luke 15:28-30
“The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’”

Wow! How had he lived with the Father all of those years and totally missed who He was? As many of us can attest, certainly me, we can miss who God is by a country mile. Satan tries to twist our view of God into a 180-degree distortion. Due to my very legalistic religious upbringing as a child and young adult, Satan has been more effective in such attempts than I like to admit. It’s embarrassing to admit, especially for a student and teacher of the Bible. But Satan is nothing if not incredibly cunning and deceptive and effective at what he does.

But Here’s the Answer!

Luke 15:31-32
“‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.
32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

“Everything I have is yours.” Thus said the Father to the child of a king. He had it all and didn’t know it! He had the Father and all that the Father owned. He was a prince. He lived as a son with the King – in ignorance, without appreciation and with resentment. That’s beyond sad; it’s tragic. Is that you? Is that me? It all depends on our view of God and of God and you (your relationship). How can you tell? Your level of gratitude toward God and your level of love for the unlovely is a good place to start looking for the answer.

Back to the Title (Again)

Child of the King and servants of the King – disciples are both. Which concept do you most treasure and like to picture yourself as being? Think about it a bit before reading further. Please…

No matter what your answer, I think I know what it should be. What do you think is God’s favorite way of viewing himself – king or servant? Take another moment to consider your answer… Beyond question, I believe it is the latter. We so miss God and who he really is! Oh yes, he is all of the magnificent things we can contemplate: Creator of all, Judge of all, the All-Knowing, All-Powerful God of all. But God has no emotional need of such titles. We humans need them due to our incredible selfishness and resultant continual bent toward rebellion. But the most accurate picture of God you could ever have is that of a suffering servant, a God on his knees with towel in hand washing the dirty feet of those who, like us in our humanity, failed to see him as he really is – the Servant God wrapped in flesh, volunteering for death on a cross as a common criminal. But wait a minute, you say – he wasn’t a criminal, he was sinless! No, that day he was identifying as a criminal, for on the cross “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us (2 Corinthians 5:21) as “He himself bore our sins in his body on the cross” (1 Peter 2:24).

No writer of whom I am aware has been able to portray God as servant quite like my old friend, Jim McGuiggan, someone I wrote about recently in another column. As he often says, God didn’t become a servant at the Incarnation when he became a human; rather, he became a human because he was already a servant, always a servant. All of us are created in the image of God, and like him, we can be identified with many terms, all of which are accurate in their own right. But regarding our nature, some things about us are more dominate than others. Likely one descriptor fits us better than any other. The descriptor that identifies God best is servant, for that ever-giving heart drove him irresistibly to the cross. Yes, God is love, said John, but love manifests itself in different ways and in different degrees. I think its greatest way and greatest degree is encapsulated accurately and astonishingly as simply, “Suffering Servant.” Jesus actually made the point quite clear in these words:.

Matthew 20:25-28 
Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. 26 Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

Therefore, that is what I want to be; who I want to be. I am not that – yet! But I want to be and I’m trying to take that road and stay on that road at every fork along the way. I wish I were doing so much better at it. I’m glad to be the son of a King, the very King of kings and Lord of lords. But the high-water mark of all that anyone can be is servant. Please, Lord, let me be the servant of a king, the King – my King! In the name of Jesus, your human name, Amen!

The Magic Wand and the Touch, by David Malutinok

This world has so many problems.  We try to solve those problems through political means and through our freedoms in America to protest and aggressively comment against our leaders.  When we think about the problems in this country of racism, poverty, inequality, bullying and so on, it can get very overwhelming.  Wouldn’t it be great if someone had a magic wand to immediately make good out of evil?  Imagine if there was a young teen that had the power of one swish of that magic baton and could immediately stop racism.  What if a teacher somehow found out she had the ability to whisk away poverty because she was in possession of a magic pointer?  They would be celebrities.  They would be heroes.

Once Upon a Time…

 There was a man that had such a power, and this is not a Fairy Tale. His name was Jesus.  He commanded attention everywhere he went.  In Matthew 4, crowds followed him, listened to his teaching and were healed of various diseases and illnesses.  In Matthew 5, the crowds were so large that he had to go onto a mountainside so everyone could hear him teach and experience his healing power.  Matthew 14 tells us that the crowds were so large and constant that in trying to get some alone time, he left on a boat. Yet, people followed him on foot from many towns.  Jesus was that celebrity I mentioned earlier.  He had power that no one ever experienced before.  He had the ability to teach in a way that no one had ever heard before.  He had the power to raise his magic staff and heal the crowds in one fell swoop.  What are the examples that the Gospel writers tell us of how he healed the masses?

The Gospels reference Jesus’ healing ministry over 80 times in over 30 chapters of the Gospel accounts, which comprise 33% of his entire ministry.  Wow, to have his magic wand now would be priceless!  The problem is, he had no magic wand.  He didn’t use special fairy dust that would blow over the multitudes.  So how did he heal all those people?  Simply through touch.  Relationship. Singular compassion on each person he saw.  Personal contact.  There was no fairy dust, there was no magic wand but there was the healing power of social interaction.

Imagine the lines that formed to receive healing.  Also imagine the excitement when the mother was holding her daughter who needed healing and was next in line.  Then she steps up to Jesus, and even though there are large crowds, Jesus is totally focused on her and her daughter.  Jesus was focused on that little girl.  He asked what her name was?  Bending down to her, the girl looked into the eyes of a man who had authority over the angels. Those same eyes that knew the world before it was formed.  And most of all, amongst the noise and confusion, she saw those eyes focused solely on her. Story after healing story, Jesus touched.  He touched physically, sometimes just emotionally or verbally.  He healed through personal connection.

Making It Personal

My job is to help the poor.  As a leader of HOPE worldwide, we seek to help the poor as much as possible with the resources we are blessed with.  In my daily walk, I try to help the poor as much as I can.  I have been a disciple for over 43 years and have tried to incorporate that into my life. I have tried my best, with countless failures, to walk as Jesus walked, yet I have recently learned a lesson of helping the poor that has been very clear in the Bible I have been reading for four decades, but I missed it. How did Jesus help those in need?  How would Jesus help the poor today?  How would he respond to the woman at the stop light asking for money? How would he respond to the homeless living under a bridge?

HOPE worldwide has an audacious goal that is two-fold.  We aspire to see all disciples regularly helping the poor as they go about their typical day. The world is full of those with unmet needs for the most basic things in life.  But we also hope that through serving the poor, the server will be transformed to be more like Jesus, and that the beneficiary of that service would see and feel the love of Jesus.

When I hand out a dollar bill to that guy at the stop light, I feel good about myself, and that man is glad that he is making progress toward his daily goal, but neither of us are really transformed.  When I hand the sandwich out to the homeless souls living in the cold on hard, wet concrete, I’m sure they are glad to have something to eat that day, and I feel good that I took time out of my schedule to serve because of my desire to please God.  But I was not transformed, and I doubt that the person I helped was either.  Begging is demeaning, reducing a person created in God’s image to be reinforced in the belief that he or she is only a beggar.

Ahh – Real Transformation

Recently I tried a different method of helping a person in need.  I was coming home from one of my frequent Home Depot runs.  At a small intersection near my house, a number of individuals stand at the intersection to ask for money.  As usual, if I had cash in small denominations, and the traffic allowed, I would give the person a few dollars.  This time I decided to practice what HOPE worldwide (and I) preach.  I stopped the car alongside the road and got out of my car, then asked the gentleman if he and I could talk for a few minutes.  At first, he was leery of my request, but I tried to assure him that it was cool.  He then came over to find out what I wanted.  I introduced myself and told him I just wanted to talk with him about his life, and if I could pray with him. I let him know that I would give him whatever money he would miss out on by talking to me instead of collecting dollar bills from passers-by.

We spoke for about 15 minutes.  I asked him his story, where he came from, if he had any kids etc.  It was a very heartfelt conversation, especially as he sensed that I had no hidden agenda.  As he spoke more, I can tell you that for this brief moment, Isaiah felt like a man who was respected for who he was as a person.  We discussed having teenage kids, his old job fixing cars, and how the Bible assures us that every human being is created in God’s image.  Finally, I asked him if I could put my hand on his shoulder and pray for him.  He looked shocked in a good way.  We bowed our heads and I prayed.  Afterward he told me with a slight tear in his eyes that no one had ever prayed for him.  I offered him a twenty-dollar bill to make up for his lost revenue for the time he talked with me. He flatly refused. I told him that if he didn’t take it, I would just leave it on the street and it would just blow away.  We laughed and he sheepishly took the money.

As I drove off, I realized that I had been transformed in a way that I never would have had I just opened my window and handed him some money.  I want to believe that Isaiah was also transformed, at least for that moment in time. Jesus didn’t just throw out his healing powers to those that would catch them.  In every healing, he personally and freely gave his power to an individual, one touch at a time.  Since that experience imitating Jesus, as I read the Gospels, I am reminded of my friend Isaiah and the thousands of people Jesus touched, interpersonally, respectfully and compassionately, one person at a time. I think I hear Jesus still saying, “Go thou and do likewise.” Are we listening?

An Old Favorite

Jim McGuiggan is a friend, an old friend more than a current friend, but an important friend. Jim taught for a number of years at the Sunset School of Preaching training ministers. During some of those years, I was teaching at the Preston Road School of Preaching, a very similar training program. During that time and shortly thereafter, Jim and I spent a few very enjoyable times together, to me very memorable times. With his combination of wit and Irish brogue, I thought him to be a most captivating speaker. In fact, he was one of my favorites during those years when our lives overlapped.

I was also a fan of his books. He wrote much like he spoke, thus also in captivating ways. He delved into several genres of spiritual writing as he penned a large number of books. One, he wrote of doctrinal matters, much of it about the end times. Several of his books absolutely destroy the now popular premillennial views. One of the early promotors of this heresy was Hal Lindsey, and Jim addressed Lindsey’s teaching very directly and very effectively. Anyone willing to follow Jim’s arguments with Bible in hand would agree with my statement that he decimated the views of Lindsey and all others who followed in his steps. Just to clarify, that would include the popular “Left Behind” books and movie, based on a false doctrine of the “Rapture.” (You can read my material addressing the same issues on my website, gordonferguson.org.)

Another genre Jim pursued was that of biblical expositions. He wrote a number of commentaries on both Old Testament and New Testament books. His commentaries on the Prophets were to me invaluable. Knowing that he wasn’t going to be caught up in speculative teaching when interpreting difficult passages and books, like Ezekiel, gave me comfort when studying the prophets. I didn’t agree with everything he wrote, but as is accurately said of scholars, even if you don’t end up agreeing with them on a given point, you will never look at that point in quite the same way again.

The third genre of Jim’s writing falls into the realm of devotional books. Presently, I am rereading his “The God of the Towel,” with the subtitle “Knowing the Tender Heart of God.” He has written a series of books like this one containing short chapters, most of them two or three pages each, that are almost unique in their ability to reach the heart. I begin most of my days reading one of the short chapters in one of these books. I will end this post with one of these little golden nuggets, their value lying in both the content and the way it is presented. The man is a captivating writer, at least to me. I also read similar pieces on his blog, “Spending Time with Jim McGuiggan” (https://jimmcguiggan.wordpress.com/).

Perhaps his longest book in this genre is “Celebrating the Wrath of God.” Although the title is scary, I think overly so, the book is similar to my most popular book, “The Victory of Surrender.” When I am on a personal spiritual retreat, I read several books in addition to spending much time in prayer and listening to spiritual music. I always read my own “Surrender” book and have read Jim’s “Celebration” book at least five times through the years. I obviously value the potential of its spiritual impact immensely.

In all of his writing, Jim is clearly an independent thinker. He has, and does, read very widely and quotes or references other writers of all types, an interesting number of them atheists. He is not a narrow thinker, confined within the walls of spiritual orthodoxy. Most writers in any genre are often called “Me Too” authors. In other words, they express about the same things others have already expressed. They just look for new ways to say them. Jim is decidedly not one of these types. He often goes in directions I’ve never read about or thought about, and therein lies a significant part of the value of reading JM. You are forced to keep thinking and keep learning.

There you have it – my appreciation for an old friend and his contribution to my spiritual knowledge, and more importantly, to my spiritual life. When I was young, it was his doctrinal and expositional writing that most intrigued me. Now that I am old, it is his devotional material that warms my heart. Many of the heart-warming nuggets are introduced with a sharp edge that first opens the heart to let the other in. He is a master at the technique, almost in a class by himself as far as I’m concerned.

Jim is now in his 80’s, a few years older than me. He lost his dearly loved wife, Ethel, some years back, and I suspect a part of Jim died with her. But she still lives in his writing, appearing at unsuspected times in unsuspected ways. My old friend and I are obviously in our last phase of life on planet earth. My most important pursuit in this phase of life is simply to seek the heart of God and walk with him. Jim, thank you for being such a help to me for so many decades, and especially in this present one. And now the quote from the last paragraph of a little chapter from “The God of the Towel,” entitled “More Than Pardon.”

But there is one thing we need to be clear about – it must be holiness we want and not mere pardon; it must be holiness we want and not merely the sugary sweet “love” we hear so much of. And if it is holiness we want, God will go after it in us and will not ask us if we’re happy about the way he pursues it.

NOTE: this article originated as a Facebook post on both of my FB pages.

Gratitude: How Soon We Forget

Few sins are as disgusting as ingratitude. A study of God’s dealings with mankind would surely demonstrate how strongly God thinks that this is indeed the case. We humans agree with his assessment—as long as we are observing a lack of thankfulness in the lives of others! However, we often appear fairly unaware of the depth of this problem in our own personal lives. If we can learn to see through the eyes of God, hopefully we can be moved to a consistent repentance of this sin of ingratitude and can become people of grace and thankfulness.

The fatal plunge of the first century world into degradation and perversion began with a loss of thankfulness toward God. Romans 1:21 makes the genesis of a downward spiral into disaster very clear: “For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts became darkened.” I have not written an article on gratitude simply because this makes us happier people or better people; I have written it because a scarcity of gratitude will most surely lead to our missing heaven. Our failure generally to appreciate the magnitude of the subject’s importance demonstrates just how effective Satan has been in deceiving us. Had our mother Eve not lost her appreciation for God and his wondrous grace, she would not have taken the fatal bite of forbidden fruit. Let’s not underestimate for a moment the vital nature of the study of this topic. It is paramount to our spiritual growth, gracious demeanor and to our eternal destiny.

Why do we lose our gratitude so easily? Several reasons come to mind rather quickly. One, we often have a shallow grasp of our own sinfulness. A good study of Romans 1-3 should help us deepen our convictions about the magnitude of our sin. Here, Paul is the Spirit’s tool to convict us of sin, righteousness and judgment (John 16:7-8). When I ponder sin, I think to myself, “The Best of Us Is a Mess.” And we really are a mess in comparison to Jesus Christ. However, we all too often measure ourselves by other people which makes us feel reasonably righteous in comparison. The more we see Jesus as he is and ourselves as we are, the more we are going to be grateful that God has reached down in mercy to such undeserving creatures.

Two, we are plagued with abysmally short memories. In 2 Peter 1, the apostle reminds us that a real understanding of God’s grace should move us to be growing continually. Peter views a failure to respond in this way as quite unnatural, no matter how common it may be: “he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins” (2 Peter 1:9). The old adage “familiarity breeds contempt” is often true, even when the familiarity is with our Creator.

Three, ingratitude may simply trace back to a sinful heart that blocks the understanding—and therefore the appreciation—of spiritual realities. I remember times when I dealt with sin in my heart in a radical way (which for me means with much prayer, often accompanied by fasting). After such times my spiritual heart seems soft and sensitive, and the tears of appreciation flow easily. Thinking back to those moving experiences makes me marvel at how quickly the tenderness of heart can fade.

Four, a self-focused life certainly results in little thankfulness. My childhood years contributed to my self-focus. Although I was raised in a very blue-collar setting, without an abundance of money, we were comfortable, and I was given much of what I requested. In less kindly terms, I was spoiled (hopefully not permanently!). As a result, I characteristically respond to events in my life in a selfish way. When things go well for me, I think, Fine, that’s the way it should be. When things don’t go well for me, I react internally by thinking, “What is going on here?” I have served the Lord faithfully; this shouldn’t be happening to me! When I allow my sinful nature to lead me in this direction, I respond to blessings without much thankfulness and to challenges without much grace. Prayerfully, I have made lots of progress in changing these tendencies, but I must guard against them continually to avoid being an ingrate.

Five, a suspect picture of God is one of the more serious, yet subtle, culprits behind ingratitude. We develop our view of God from the most important authority figures in our lives, normally our fathers. If our fathers were beneficent, leaning toward permissiveness with us, we are likely to take God’s goodness for granted. If our fathers were distant or harsh, we are likely to view God in much the same way. And if we see him as impersonal, uncaring or demanding, we will misinterpret life’s blessings and challenges, remaining unaware of the bounty of his grace. The reality of who he is and what he does can be missed almost entirely. If we are like the one-talent man in Matthew 25, we will see him as a “hard” man (verse 24). If we are like the older brother in the Parable of the Lost Son, we will see him as a father who has done absolutely nothing for us (Luke 15:29). Astounding!

For everyone who decides to seek Jesus seriously, a study of the book of Romans is a must. When we begin to understand the God it portrays, we can be consistently motivated by gratefulness for his amazing grace. My book, “Romans: the Heart Set Free,” is a good resource for this study.

Whatever the cause of ingratitude, the cure is in taking the time to figure out life as God designed it to be, rather than life as Satan wants us to see it. Then the message will not be how soon we forget, but how often and deeply we remember the overwhelming goodness of our God. Let’s take this present season of thankfulness and truly count our blessings and live a life of genuine gratefulness and appreciation for all God has done for us.

“So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.”  —Colossians 2:6-7

“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.”  —Colossians 4:2

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe.”  —Hebrews 12:28

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”  —Colossians 3:15